German

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Another bloody W126 Benz – Lost Property

The only car I have ever owned that someone lost. No, really.


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Making the moss-t of it. My Mercedes W126 500SEL…

It was a moss-covered Mercedes. It’s a play on words, geddit?


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My Mercedes W123 280E…

It was a high-end, quality automobile. It also smelled like wee inside.


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The W220 Mercedes-Benz S Class…

Look like a mob boss or Sir Lordypants Alan Sweeter, despite the fact you work part time at Greggs.


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Ultimate Failing Machine – My BMW E28…

It was £300, so what the hell was I expecting?


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The Audi TT…

If you buy one only to have someone call you a hairdresser, give them a slap. They couldn’t be more wrong.


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The BMW 7 Series…

Because driving isn’t much fun unless you look like a gangster.


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The ‘new’ Volkswagen Beetle…

Like the old one, but with more Golf underneath it and more water cooling the engine.